Body language isn’t just a few types of behavior to analyze but rather a mix of many tells that can help you better understand the person in front of you. Most of the time, body language is very effective in order to discern the genuineness of a person and decide whether or not they are worthy of trust/a good person in general.
1- Their Eyes:
One of the most important things in body language is people’s eye contact. An example would be of someone who tries as much as they can to get eye contact with others is either:
Looking for approval, in the case of someone who’s selective rather than inclusive; someone who would do this with only a few people but ignore others
Trying to make everyone comfortable, in the opposite case of someone who is trying to be inclusive and make everyone feel part of the group.
A last example, is someone who, as opposed to the previous example, avoids eye contact.
Just like in the last example, there are two cases:
- Selective: Wants to make a point that not everyone in this group is worth the same to them.
- Exclusive: Is either afraid or considers themselves superior to the situation; they’d rather be elsewhere. Uncomfortable for sure, but not necessarily weak.
However, eye contact is not the only parameter to take into consideration when it comes to people’s body language through eyes.
Let me explain.
Many will tell you that an insisting eye contact is sign of confidence and/or genuine attention, it’s important to keep in mind that people will use this common belief to lure others.
A liar might be looking straight to your eyes and still lie in your face. Which makes this argument irrelevant. Instead, also analyze what people look at, not just the intensity at which they do. Wait for a time where the person is not having a conversation, as it tells more than when they are trying to give an impression, there is more genuineness to it.
Someone who looks at other people’s clothes or possessions for example is someone that is comparing himself to the other person.
2- The Space They Take:
Space and body language are VERY closely related. For this however, it’s a bit more straightforward compared to the eyes. The more space they take, the more confident and comfortable they are.
What is meant by space goes from how they walk, stand, sit to how they eat and speak. It’s however important to note that, sometimes, when they take too much space, it becomes obvious that they’re rather insecure or completely stupid.
Confident people do take space but they do not impose themselves in the personal space of others.
Why? Because they care about their own personal space.
They respect the limits but will stand right on them without ever crossing them or threatening to do so.
3- The Head Stability:
Head stability is not only a sign of confidence but also a sign of interest. If they’re moving their head to much, looking around sometimes or simply trying to find the right position, they’re uncomfortable and intimidated or completely disinterested.
PS: You will only be able to draw a conclusion if you analyze the other parameters.
A stable head movement on the other hand expresses the ease and self-acceptance, the person knows how they look and how they behave and do not try to find the ‘right’ head position as they feel comfortable being themselves. It is often a sign of someone that does not seek validation.
However, a very rigid head movement, too stable and not flexible enough indicates the opposite; since it probably comes from an effort to appear concentrated and interested or even sometimes superior (big fail). This last type of head movement shows someone that is trying to show someone they’re not really; It screams insecurity.
4- Do they hide their belly & torso?
Crossed arms? Uncomfortable, not open for discussion. It also shows anxiety and vulnerability. Leave them alone unless you want to make them feel uncomfortable for whatever valid (I hope it’s valid) reason.
This defensive position comes from our natural instinct of protecting our torso and belly from physical attacks. Someone in this position can very quickly get angry/sad as they probably feel attacked.
A weakness position that says long about what’s going on in their mind.
On the other hand, people who use their hand gestures, hold their hands on their back, or do anything that doesn’t involve closing down on themselves; are people who are open to discussion and feel completely comfortable. Not just because of their belly but also because of their expressiveness.
After all, if they’re not using their arms to “protect” themselves; they must be using them to either show openness (arms behind back) or express their ideas through hand gestures.